Beating the boy in you out

You imagine, everyday you imagine and think of the way some situations would better be solved, solved to the end, the ultimate end, once and for all! And this has always led you to think about your city, your capital city, the very streets that as a boy you walked, the very streets where men must be men to earn respect, your father told you so, he had earned his, but you are not your father.

You are you, the very boy who one day in the busy chaotic streets of Nairobi was accosted by two crooks, roughed up and ended giving them the only one hundred shillings note you had in your pocket, they took it, asked you the bus fare back home, you said fifty bob, they gave you forty and sent you away with a warning-next time curry with you real money boy! A hundred then was real money, at least for you, the seventeen year old you then, you wanted to treat your then girlfriend for some chipsy but now, you had no money for such expenses, just your bus fare back and the frightened you, you swore this would never happen and yes you kept your promise real, it never happened in the next seven years that you walked down the streets, you knew where to be and when to be where, you knew where not to be and when not to be where.

But time has really gone now, you have been away from mother land for a considerable amount of time, and now you wonder what would happen if such a thing was to replay itself again, the what if question is so filling your mind that you feel you need to do something to avoid such and like circumstances, and you are good at planning ahead, at least you must be if you have to make it to your goals in this life, and what if is the question which only a man can answer, the boy in you must be kicked out of your life.

The boy? well, yes the boy, the one that got robbed in broad day light by two unarmed men. If they had been armed, let say with a gun or a knife, at least the story would be worth telling, i mean when they brandish a gun, everybody will understand what danger that might have posed, but what people will never understand-and this is why you never narrate this story, is why you let your one hundred shillings that had been planned to give somebody some glimpse of pleasure be taken by unarmed street crooks, your bigger brother argued that if he was in your position, he would have been able to thwart the intimidation, you beg to differ but true to that he has ever done it and in his case they were actually three, he made it out unharmed and smiling with his money and this he screams in your head for you to understand, and you know he has a point, you were the coward and a loser, that’s why you let go so easy, but this will never reoccur.

So to be a man, the boy in you must die. You want to be a man like back when men were men, remember the time? Back in those days when disrespect was the subject of a duel, back when one did not have to call the police to teach some crooks not to cross certain lines, back in them days when men spoke their word and meant it and were taken seriously because everybody tried to avoid the consequences of not doing so, yes those men, and you have to kick out the boy in you to emulate their standards!

So to be the man, you have to invest your time and money in certain services, good for your health, good for your wealth and security wise viable, you have to learn some martial arts first, the rest is discipline and physiological concurrence. To avoid imagining again a what if somebody stole your wife’s purse or pushed down your son or daughter-not that you have any of those, but the future is brighter when today’s imaginations are clear, you will have them in this life, the prospect of protecting them keeps you awake, and awake as a man you are, you must be.

You would have preferred kick boxing or karate or Jui-jitsu or something more rounded but everything is going for a lot of money, you don’t have enough and so you choose boxing, a one way discipline but the cost is effectively generous and you also get to keep the door open for a future chance to try something else-its not the end of the world, its not like you are going professional anyway you just want to beat the boy out and be a man, a man that can handle things in person.

You enroll in this gym several stops from work pace, this way you can pass by after work and work out. And this comes to pass, it’s already day one, well, hell has away of breaking loose on this day, this is the day when you learn you will be running up and down, squatting and jumping ropes, doing push ups and getting shouted at by this man who a nightfall ago cashed your cheque, that you are paying him to shout at you pisses you off more than you actually get pisses off by being shouted upon. You expected to punch the bag and to dance around it-this is why you paid for boxing practice and not some sort of team building aerobics, that’s you burning in anger, or maybe he should let you punch the ass out of that speed bag, but the man, this freaking man who is probably drinking the water in his bottle bought by your money is screaming up and down, pushing you beyond any physical job you ever did and acting as if he is your boss!

You don’t take it kindly, and he seems to have noticed it but still keeps pushing you. You wish in your dreams to kick his ass, but you know better, he can kick yours at will-he is actually doing it in a way, and there is nothing you can do about it boy! So you follow the orders and do as he says rest you lose your money and you end up with a broken jaw, you swear in your heart that this day will be the first and the last to ever attend such sessions and you are sure to keep it that way, but at the end of this two hour ordeal, he comes to you, remember you have not punched any bag yet, and tells you, its more of a mental game than physical but it is still physical, take a day off tomorrow you will experience some pains in your muscles but show up the day after, no pain no gain, he was right, you now sleep like a quarry worker who filled a truck with ballast milled by hand, and true to that, beating the boy out takes commitment, beating the boy out takes sacrifice, beating the boy out is all you want, today is that day after he spoke about, and you are ready to kick the heck out of your ass.

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